Roller Curtster

Those who know me best, (and those people are rare) know I've been through the mill over the past 7 years or so; they also know that no matter how much I gripe, growl or groan I'm always going to keep moving forward.

Wife leaving, dog put down due to cancer, job vanishing due to angry boss and nasty investors fighting and then said nasty investors liquidating 300 people, two of my favorite houses being sold off because of prior mentioned events; yep it's been rough ride on the roller coaster of life.

I moved, changed my life around and said goodbye to 18 years of the dread insurance game; I found Colorado and it was good. While there I did have to move on from another lover, left another dog behind, (at least she was still alive) and it all had to happen like some Twilight Zone version of my prior experience...that was rough, but less so than the first time...guess it's like riding the same roller coaster over and over; it's still got the same twists and turns, but you know what to expect after the first time.

I loved Colorado; I loved being a bum and doing what I wanted when I wanted and how I wanted! The freedom of those last 2 years of my 3 years in the Enchanted Valley of Northglenn, Co will live forever in my memory as the golden age of Curt.

There were issues of course; I don't lead that charmed kind of existence that has moments of perfection. No, even during my moments of perfection there is some hair out of place, or loud stomping pompous ass making noise above me 20 hours out of every day...but I can deal with that if everything else is golden.

Money running short and jobs in shorter supply I started to think of what ride I should go on next; I had always wanted to join the Peace Corps; in fact I had done the paperwork in my late 20's just before I met my ex wife and left the PC line for that new attraction.

So being free and amazingly unencumbered of emotional or monetary debt, I joined the Peace Corps and left for Jamaica in July of 2008; just prior to then my mom passed away unexpectedly at the end of May. It was rough and the USPC almost didn't let me take my assignment, but I convinced them it was the right time for me and off I went.

I was sworn in to service on August 28th 2008 and thus began my first official year of Peace Corps Jamaica. I was in for an amazing ride; the people I met, places I went and things I learned about myself, my culture and then others and their culture are experiences I will not only keep a life time, but will take a life time to sort through.

I planned to go home for 1 vacation during my 2 years in Jamaica; the plan was August 11th through September 2nd. Then my father got sick and I was called on the 27th of July to rush home to his bedside. I arrived on the 28th and he succumbed to his illness just two days later; suddenly I was a 45 year old orphan... my mind was like a poor little Oliver, "Please sir, I don't want any more!"

While I was back in the USA I realized just how much I loved America; my home, my culture. Watching the USA from Jamaica we seem so ridiculous; I mean all the BS with movie stars and politicians and people stomping people into the floor to buy a new X Box...but then I came home and I was just blown away by all that we have and what we've done with it.

We Americans are goofy sure, but after living abroad for over a year I realized that all humans are just young babes in the universe and we're just crawling around trying to learn how to take those first few steps. I had lived for a year in a culture just starting to roll over, after being born to a land that was already up on it's hands and knees rocking.

So when I could step back for a few moments from the loss of my father, I was able to notice that I felt more love for my family than I had in ages, relished the time with my friends in a way I hadn't in years and when the air turned cold one night and I could smell fall inthe wind, my very spirit smiled. This was my home; not one state, but the the very state of being...American.

When the time came to get back on the airplane and head back for my second year in Jamaica it was rough; this roller coaster of a life I have been living the past 7 years or so seemed like it was ready to pull into the loading station and stop to let me off for a while...but I had said I'd ride until the end and those who know me best know I'm in it to the end, win or lose.

I'm in a new place this second year; I moved from the middle of Jamaica to the tip; changed from a business town, to tourist stop and from friends and familiar faces, to a whole new set of people and places. Up the hill and down I plunge; stomach in my throat, hands gripping the cross bar as I try to keep my head from banging around from side to side. It's thrilling and scary and you want it to keep going and stop all at the same time...

In 8 months I'll be leaving Jamaica; I have no clue what comes next; like a walk through Six Flags, you wait in a long line, talk to your friends and then climb into the next roller coaster and see what the ride is going to be like.